The circus elephant has lost its way.: Stories

Hey everybody. I'm back! Christmas has exploded at our house! Actually, all over our house. Along with all our other belongings.

And some other stuff happened too, that I just haven't had the time to write about. Or really even think about, honestly. But next weekend the REAL Christmas festivities start, so I thought I'd take a minute and tell some stories so e'erbody is updated.

1. I went to Ft Lauderdale/Hollywood for a conference. The conference, American College of Neuropsychopharmacology (It sounds smart, yes?), was nice. I got lots of great feedback on my poster from all the gods in my field. But Ft. Lauderdale? Yuck. Not going back there again if I have a choice. There are so many crabby people there-I would be so happy if I lived at the beach-what is wrong with these people??

Also, I evidently accidentally rented a "timeshare apartment" instead of a hotel room. Talk about creeptastic. And it was in dire need of updating. Add that to the fact that I had no idea until I arrived; I just knew I had gotten a really good deal. It had wifi, though. It also had a kitchen, living room, dining room, bedroom suite, huge closets and two bathrooms. I could walk to the boardwalk and a nice beach from there, but it was kind of in a shady part of town, where evidently businesses go to die. So after dark I didn't do a whole lot of walking around alone. And I was traveling alone, so that was a challenge. But it was only a 1 mile walk from the conference site, which was super ritzy. Anyway, there will some pictures of my weird abode. After I manage to fanagle them off my dumb phone.
I'm convinced it (the timeshare, not my phone) is secretly owned by the mafia.

2. Our fridge picked a great time to break, and our dairy products lived on our porch for about 3 nights last week, since it was about 30 degrees anyways. And our frozen goods have been living in the freezer in the kitchen at my lab for a week. I perhaps was overly worried about the cranberries thawing and ruining any future cranberry bread, but I am happy to report that everything turned out fine. And Em has ate TV dinners made specially for toddlers because I am a freak about food safety rules when it comes to her. For about three days. The landlord said we needed to defrost it and then call him if it doesn't work after that. Let's just say that I am not optimistic. And also what happens next time it needs defrosting? It's SUPPOSED to do that automatically. I'll be damned if I'm defrosting it every week or so. So I guess we will see. An update on that front: The fridge seems to be doing fine after its vacation. Perhaps it will live until 2013.

Yep. We are those people.
I thought this was not one of my worst ideas, actually.

3. It is Christmas! It took 5 days from the time we bought our Christmas tree to getting it actually decorated. Partially because we realized on the night we planned to decorate the tree that we couldn't find the lights. Then Rob had to go back up into the attic. Anyway, the tree finally got decorated, but I am not feeling very optimistic about the stockings being hung up anywhere this year. About the tree, though- every time Em sees it, there is pure magic on her face. It's amazing.

Em sees our decorated tree for the first time:

See, I told you. MAGIC.

And she got to meet Santa last weekend and see some of her (2nd) cousins! And Aunt Beth and Uncle Gary! She was not too sure about Santa, but he gave her a book which she loved so she didn't cry when he held her on his lap.

Em thinks this Santa guy must be pretty important if she gets to stay up this far past bedtime.

Santa gives Em a book. One of us looks a little too excited.

Wow, she loves Gary. Ran right to him when he walked in.

Also, we have opted to use our "christmas chicken" as a topper this year. Rob bought this for me as a random gift the first year that we decorated a tree together. Those of you that have EVER been to my house know that it stays out all year round. On the piano, kitchen table, mantle, wherever. Christmas Chicken just happens to have a hole up his butt, perfect for the placement of a Christmas Tree.

Mr. Homie. A gift to us all.

Today, I spent ALL DAY BAKING. I used about 31 eggs, 12 pounds of flour, 10 pounds of sugar, some butter, you know...the works. I got 4 big loaves of cranberry bread, 9 big loaves of pumpkin bread, and many many mini-loaves of pumpkin bread out of the deal. And about 8 dozen cookie dough (choc chip/oatmeal) balls for our freezer, you know, for emergencies. And guess what. Those were all for Christmas gifts. Not the cookie dough. And I still have more to do! And baking to do for our own Christmas! Anyway, the little gift breads turned out so cute, wrapped with green curly ribbon, a hand-made tag, and the recipe for the goodie. I call this a win. And everyone can stop giving Rob a hard time for not helping, because he basically was on baby duty all day so I could do the baking for our friends and co-workers.

It's tragic how far behind I am on present-wrapping. But I am slowly but surely getting there. I'm blogging because Christmas is making me want to vomit a little bit right now. And I would give my big (pedicured) toe for a glass of wine right now. But I suppose I'll have tea. Mighty tea.

4. I have a new hair guy. Not really new. I got my hair cut about 5 weeks ago. But my other hair guy quit doing hair and I was traumatized by having to get someone new so suddenly. So now I'm telling the story. The new guy's name is Kain Dove. He majored in theatre and moved to New York to become Johnny Depp. But what he ended up doing was working for Betsy Johnson (who got bought out by Steve Madden) and he met Johnny Depp once. And also I learned that Johnny Depp is really short and loves dogs and is a very nice person. Anyway, then he started doing hair. The point of this story is that I think Kain Dove is a fake (stage?) name, but since he has only cut my hair one time I don't feel like we have the type of relationship where I can just ask him that. So, when I go back in 2-3 weeks I will hopefully be asking him.

5. Em has decided a couple of things. The first is that she enjoys scarves. Especially this one that Abby made me for Christmas one year as a trick. The trick being that she told me it was someone else's scarf, and she knit it while we watched TV together. We were roommates at the time. She also really enjoys her books now, which thrills me until I have to pick them up. But it's so cute when she brings me her books to read. She has two definite favorites, "Hello, Bugs!", and "Hello Kitty Goes to Town".

Yes, that is the plug to my hair dryer she is holding.

Also, Abby gave her this outfit!